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Deer: 1, Vehicle: 1

October 15th, 2008 · No Comments · Personal

So me and my car had a little run-in with a deer tonight driving home from Denny’s. I swear, they need to ease up on the hunting bans again cause deer are just getting a little too prolific these days and are posing more and more danger to drivers. On my way out to hang with my friends earleir tonight I must have passed like three whole herds grazing on the side of the road, so coming home I was driving (relatively) slow and had my eyes peeled. Coming around a corner I spotted a doe standing in the middle of the opposite lane, struck dumb in my high beams of course. I slow down but as it turns to gallop back off the road I let off the brake to coast by – at which point it does an abrupt 180 and decides, by golly, that it wil cross the damn road. By this time my front end is just crossing it’s path and I know there’s no way I can avoid it, so I brace myself and scream silently inside as it CRUNCHES against my driver-side door.

After immediately pulling over to the side of the road, after a few seconds of assesment to make sure the car is running okay, I pull around and head back, hoping to see the damn deer on the ground twitching or something so I can run it over. No such luck, as the blasted animal had retreated back across the road to where it came from and then brazenly crossed over again right in front of me. Too bad my front bumper is little more than plastic or I would have rammed it.

So I pull another U-turn and drive the rest of the way home, agonizing the whole while over the inevitable damage done to my poor baby. No I did not get out on the side of the dark country backroad to check for damage, of course. The car drove fine so I figured it had just impacted my door and left its body imprinted into the side of my car. Bastard.

I get home like 7 minutes later and park in front of the security lights so I can see, and step out with a curse to survey the damage. To what do my incredulous eyes appear is nothing but a nice, shiny, smooth door panel!? I must be dreaming. I bend down every which way so the light catches all angles and notice something on the bottom of the panel which I think at first is a scratch, but turns out to just be a smear. After some more inspection I finally notice a slightly-raised bump, not a dent but a bump, on my door.


I thought for sure the deer had rammed my car, but it looks like it got smart at the last second and decided to turn around again and I sideswiped the hell out of it. Then I also noticed that my sideview mirror had not been knocked in, so it must have been just its body and not its head or neck. The door panel is so big (being a 2-door sports car) that it was able to greatly disperse the hit and although I think the whole front-end part of the panel is pushed in a fraction of an inch, it’s barely noticeable and the door still opens and closes without complaint.

Totally dodged the bullet this time. If you’re wondering about the title for this entry, last time I ran into a deer the deer won, and I spun out and crashed backwards off the road, taking out two signs and part of a guardrail in the process, not to mention a few small saplings. I walked away from that without a scratch and although it totalled my Hyundai Tiburon GT I made good off the insurance payment and was able to buy my Z. So a happy ending to that story at least. Actually I didn’t even hit that damn deer – I swerved to avoid it on a highway while travelling 75MPH with slick road conditions. Mmmm. Lesson learned there. No, not drive slower – just hit the blasted animal.

Well that worked this time! I still wish I could have at least shot it…

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